July 16, 2009
Imagine what could happen if you were able to tap into the power of multiple minds – all focused on helping you turn dreams and goals into reality, overcome fears, and move beyond set-backs, such as a job layoff. Though they barely knew each other at the time, four Florida women – Rebecca Carswell, Mirja Heide, Tiffany Kaharick and Amy Mead – teamed up in 2006 to form The GROUP. What no one could have anticipated at the time is how profoundly it would change their lives.
What is it that gives The GROUP the power to harness the collective energy and wisdom of its members for the benefit of each individual? In their new book – The GROUP: An Amazing Way to Achieve Success, Happiness & Extraordinary Relationships (DC Press, $16.95) – Carswell, Heide, Kaharick and Mead reveal in detail the unique rules, roles and rituals that guide every meeting.
Among them, The GROUP convenes just once a month for exactly two hours. Each session consists of five timed segments designed to inspire and motivate participants. “Each segment builds upon the previous segment, moving us through an amazing journey for the evening,” says Heide. There are also designated roles – the Guide, the Timer, the Honored One and the Action Step Writer – which rotate between meetings. Generally, the Guide leads the meeting, as well as brings an offering to share. The Timer is responsible for the smooth transitions between segments and keeping the meeting on track, as well as the choice of creative props used to signal progress. The Honored One, who becomes the focus of The GROUP during the longest segment, presents a dream, goal, challenge or desired change he or she wishes to work on. And the Action Step Writer records what was said in the Honored One’s notebook – essentially providing him or her with an action plan to go home with.
While there are opportunities throughout the proceedings for each member to share, at the heart of the meeting is the full hour that is devoted to that month’s Honored One to explore new possibilities and insights while sharing feelings and ideas. She or he chooses the topic – which can be anything from the seemingly-inconsequential to issues of vast importance. The focus can be as broad and varied as the imagination, and goals can be tangible and material, or ethereal and philosophical. What sets it apart from a typical gab session between friends is the role played by the other members, who practice what the authors call “active listening” and “holding the space,” so as to provide the Honored One with a safe, supportive environment in which to express him or herself without fear of judgment.
“Because the person has an hour, so many things come up,” explains Carswell. “Fears, obstacles, action steps, hidden things that are just incredible. This is what’s keeping me from doing this! I never knew! You never know what’s going to cause that shift in the Honored One. And what’s so wonderful about it is that it’s such a treat to go home and, later that night or the next day, read what the Action Step Writer has recorded.”
At its essence, the authors explain in the book, “Something interesting happens when you state what you want out loud in front of people who believe in you and support you in achieving your goals. You start believing, too. Believing you can have what you want is an important aspect of creating what you want. Others see you more objectively. They see the whole you. They believe in you – sometimes even more than you believe in yourself.”
Dr. Lewis Losoncy, a psychotherapist and author of If It Weren’t For You, We Could Get Along! How to Stop Blaming and Start Living, notes in the book’s foreword: “There is a huge difference between a group and The GROUP. A group in the workplace has gripe sessions. In The GROUP, in the same workplace with the same people, gripe sessions are transformed into growth sessions. When sports teams use The GROUP method, they gain respect for teammates and a desire to cooperate, rather than to compete, for one shared dream. The GROUP, from settings in education and business to church and families, helps people empathize, understand, appreciate and encourage each other en route to their dreams.”
For each of the authors, the privilege of being at the center of attention as the Honored One has transformed their lives in both big and small ways. For instance, Carswell, a clinical hypnotherapist and professional speaker who had previously broken her back skydiving when the plane hit her in midair, had been putting off surgery on a dangerous cyst in her ear, after the first operation failed. “It was a really painful experience where they removed my ear to work inside of it, and it wasn’t successful. At one of the meetings I said, ‘I want to heal my ear. I want my hearing to be better.’ And with the help of my GROUP, I had the courage to go through it again.”
Tiffany Kaharick, a licensed massage therapist who loves to skydive, says her self-confidence has soared, she’s less-competitive with others, and more understanding of success and what it means to her. “The accomplishments I feel I’ve achieved from the help of The GROUP have been less about material things and more about living a happier, more peaceful and present life.”
Amy Mead, a graphic designer and former owner of a small advertising agency, was finally able to get pregnant within months of presenting her wish to The GROUP. “I remember thinking that I was not going to be able to have a baby,” says Mead, who was in her late 30s at the time. “So I brought it to The GROUP and talked about it with them. I mean, it’s wonderful, because you can talk about anything when you have a group like this.”
For 12 years, Mirja Heide, the founder of her own computer training company and a world traveler, had not been able to conquer her fear of visiting Africa alone, despite a burning passion to help the endangered Desert Elephants of Namibia. Within months of bringing it to The GROUP, she was on her way. “This is typically something I would not have shared with other people, but the sacred space of The GROUP makes you feel completely safe.”
The idea for The GROUP began over an introductory lunch between three of the authors, arranged by a mutual acquaintance. As they were heading to their cars, Carswell suggested they meet-up again, to “create a structure to help us do cool things – that would maybe add a little magic to our lives, help us accomplish goals, I didn’t really know. I said, ‘What do you think of that?,’ and their eyes lit up.”
The first meeting took place in Sebastian, Florida, in August 2006. From the beginning, the four seemed to intuitively share a vision that their monthly gathering would have a special mission. “We wanted to really see results,” says Mead. “We didn’t want this to be about sitting around chit chatting, drinking wine, that kind of thing. We really wanted to get the most out of these meetings that we possibly could.” Heide agrees: “We knew we could socialize at other times, but this was about accomplishing our goals and going for our dreams.” Indeed, no food or drink is allowed at meetings. “Nothing that will distract or interfere with the process,” says Carswell.
The first few meetings were devoted to determining what The GROUP would be. “It came about very organically. As early as the second meeting, and definitely by the third meeting, we had our format. And the rest is history. It’s just been an amazing journey,” says Mead. “We were happy with the format we had come up with, but really didn’t know what it would create for us. It took on a life of its own,” says Carswell.
Although The GROUP is being recognized as the first major book on group manifesting, only two of the women were familiar with the concept when they started. Carswell had seen “The Secret” DVD, but not read the book. “I think it’s beautiful and lovely and inspirational, but it didn’t really go into how do you do it. How do you move ahead and make stuff like that happen in your own life,” she recalls. Kaharick, who had successfully employed manifesting in the past, feels that The GROUP “definitely complements everything that is out there, and takes it one step beyond.”
It’s not surprising that the four women are now best friends. In trying to explain what the friendship has meant for her, Mead pauses. “I don’t even know where to start. I feel like almost anything I say would do it an injustice. I know that I’ve never had a connection with anyone else in my life quite like I have with these women.” Adds Kaharick: “I really can’t imagine not having these women in my life, and not having our monthly gatherings. That first meeting, I remember thinking what amazing women they are. I had never met women so positive, responsible for their own experience, accepting and non-judgmental. But the compassion, trust and understanding that we all seemed to bring to the meetings made me feel safe with these women.”
On behalf of her co-authors, Carswell says: “The four of us have created something that really is close and special and beautiful. We all feel very blessed.”
The GROUP: An Amazing Way to Achieve Success, Happiness & Extraordinary Relationships (DC Press, $16.95) by Rebecca Carswell, Mirja Heide, Tiffany Kaharick and Amy Mead is currently available in bookstores and online at Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com. For more information, visit www.TheGroupTheBook.com or visit the authors on Facebook at The GROUP The Book.
________________________________________
Hi-res images and a media kit are available upon request.
Media Contact:
Lyla Foggia
Foggia Public Relations LLC
(503) 622-0232
lyla@foggiapr.com
